I am breaking up with you, soda. Your carbonation bloats me, fills me, and gasses me in ways no woman should experience. Your acid is eroding my insides, your caramel coloring is staining my teeth. Your sugar is keeping the jiggle in my wiggle. Your caffeine is starting to give me the shakes. I love you, soda. I truly, deeply do. We have been together for as long as I can remember. No one can part us; but me.
I have to say good-bye, soda. It is for the best of myself and my future that I terminate our relationship. Maybe someday I will find self-control, and will come to visit you on an occasion. Maybe that day will never come. To say your sweet, bubbling love will never cascade across my lips again would be too extreme; too terrible to admit. For now, this is good-bye.
Always your love,
Fatty Fat Fat
Sugary drinks are the biggest source of added sugar in the U.S. diet. Each 20-ounce bottle of soda contains 16 teaspoons of sugar -- that's 22 packets of sugar and 240 empty calories in one bottle! (http://www.kickthecan.info/soda-facts)
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